Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I touched a dick in church today
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
Randomize
