She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
