First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
