I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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