Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
Randomize
