no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
