For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
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