i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Randomize
