that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I love you.
Bad choice
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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