I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Randomize
