can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize