I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
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