i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Randomize
