We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
