So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
