They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
