I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
babies were throwing up all over the place
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
