Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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