She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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