Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Randomize
