it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
