my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
They have beer where we have blood.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
