yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
Randomize
