he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Randomize