Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
