woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Randomize
