i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
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