i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
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