Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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