i think my tv is drunk
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
