she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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