Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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