when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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