you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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