And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Randomize
