i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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