Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Randomize
