There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
