Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Randomize
