it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
