He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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