24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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