One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
