You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
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