What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize
