So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
she looked like the before picture.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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