I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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