Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
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