Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
