sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I showed him my bush... on skype.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
Randomize