Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize
