Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
We need a shit load of segways right now
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
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