Hey man sorry I got all grabby
In America we eat man semen.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Randomize
